By the later years of elementary school, visits with relatives had almost stopped. No real reason. I just noticed that even at New Year we no longer went back and forth.
At the time I thought, "That's just how it is." The only thing I marked was that the New Year money envelopes had grown fewer. Being able to spend the days quietly, at my own pace, even felt convenient.
Caring how I looked, and not being good with words, may have played a part. Anyway, I felt I could not carry myself well in front of people. More than having few people to laugh with, I hated being made to see my own inadequacy. Stock stories, or playing the flatterer, were the only ways I knew to hold a room.
After I married, the relatives started up again. My wife's family were all their own people. Each was respected, and when they clashed they accepted one another again. If you missed a step, no one held it for long. There was not the slightest need to put on a front.
The liveliness of sharing even the trouble felt good.